Fiction As Hard Hitting News: AP Writes a Time Honored Fairytale

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Like Chicken Little, the Associated Press squawked a load of absolute horse shit on Friday! The most recent "the sky is falling" scenario is that more than 100,000 National Guard troops will be mobilized to round up illegal aliens. Seriously, AP, get your shit together. Then, the parade of idiots followed in tow behind them, spewing their regurgitated crap without the slightest attempt at confirming the story. USA Today, New York Post, Fox News and more were pulled into the lunacy all before 1000 EST.

Shepard Smith of Fox News tore into the President on Thursday, defending all news outlets. "And that you call us 'fake news' and put us down like children," he whined, very, er, childlike. Not even twenty-four hours later, your agency, Shepard, ran with a story that is utter fucking non-sense! Smith went on to cry in his own defense that journalists are "asking these questions on behalf of the American people." What a load of sanctimonious puke. Yes, Shepard, you have a responsibility. It's a noble one that should be taken seriously. Part of that responsibility, Shepard, is to investigate the fucking story! It's a sad day for journalism when The Huffington Post is the agency that is actually making phone calls to governors to investigate if this could even happen, while Fox News is just rushing to be the first with the accusation. They weren't, by the way. product-block-safety-pin.jpeg


Speaking of tin foil hat theories, and not about aliens this time, wasn't there another one about a Russian spy ship off the Eastern coast earlier this week? The answer is yes. And, further, it was well inside international waters. More than 30 miles off the coast, actually. Well, dummies, that's what spy ships do: they spy. And, they can go wherever they want to, in international fucking waters. This was about as interesting a revelation as if the North Korean Army's personnel department purchased paper, or the Iranian Air Force flew a plane over Tehran. Come back when you have something worth discussing. Now, get off your high horse, and do your job. Oh yeah, quit with the fear mongering and make sure it's true, you dopes.

What is really disturbing is that the news media is of vital importance in a free society. Throughout history, freedom depends on the fourth estate to keep the populace informed. That requires that it does its fucking job, and retains a high level of credibility. Have you never heard of a brainstorming session? Could this possibly be a memo that was prepared as a "what if", never to be implemented? Sounds plausible to me.

Well, Shepard, if you want to be taken seriously, then rule number one is "do not be wrong"! So squawk away, Chicken Little, or tell bullshit stories like the Boy Who Cried Wolf. Just remember that in both those tales, the main character didn't survive. You can easily be replaced, and I don't want our country to be the victim of a real villain because you were too busy reporting garbage or sniveling to your peers. If you think that we want to be told a bunch of bullshit from the first news agency to put a shitty story together rather than hear real, investigated, thought-out stories, then you, you fucking mope, are treating us like children.

sean-murphy.jpgSean “Doc” Murphy retired from the US Army as a SFC after 15 years of service. As a medic, Doc held every enlisted position in an Infantry Medical Platoon. He served three years with the Iron Rakkasans (3-187th Infantry Regiment, 101st Airborne Division), and 8 years with the Red Devils (1-504th PIR, 82nd Airborne Division). Doc deployed as a Rakkasan in support of Operation Enduring Freedom, and three times to Operation Iraqi Freedom as a Devil In Baggy Pants.

Originally from Detroit, Sean resides in Tennessee and divides his time between writing copy and volunteering for various Veteran's Charities.

The views and opinions expressed on this website are solely those of the original authors and other contributors. These views and opinions do not necessarily represent those of Gruntworks, the staff, and/or any/all contributors to this site.

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